I feel bad for you, I also suffer from the problem of “if I am not nice to someone they will go tell all their friends and my SLife will be ruined, may as well go start an alt!”

But seriously! If she went to tell her friends that you got mad and banned her because she stalked you in your private workshop and took something she shouldn’t have, they would most likely say “and your problem is??”

Recently I had someone fly to my workspace and get booted several times. When I asked, politely, why they were in my skybox, they let loose a string of cusswords. So I muted them and banned them. Then their partner IMed me OUTRAGED that I dared to have a security orb “in my store” even tho it is nowhere near my store. So another mute/ban. I try to be super nice to people, but I do NOT have to put up with being cussed at.

And people just need to learn to stay out of your private space. If you called someone on the phone and they said they were in the bathroom, you wouldn’t go to their house and walk into their bathroom!!!

I can understand where you are coming from, being a very private and non-confrontational person myself. But in this case, I would echo those who commented here before and advise you to get over the bad feeling of openly “refusing” someone in order to protect your privacy. To me, it appears that this person not only has no sense of personal space/ borders in the broad sense, but also that she enjoys making you feel uncomfortable. That’s the only way I can explain this kind of behaviour to myself, and you shouldn’t suffer it just for the sake of a peace you won’t find with her anymore anyway.

Best of luck!

First, if you cannot be assertive through IM, do write a notecard. State what has upset you, why it is unacceptable, what the boundaries are, and what will happen if the boundaries are crossed again. Yes, you need to be that specific, and not just for her- having this information laid out will give you support (or a kick in the pants) down the road if you need to take greater action. In this case, you need to say something like not only going to your private workspace without invitation was not respectful, but buying your work was very selfish – not only does it prevent you from doing your work efficiently, but it prevents the final product from coming out in a timely fashion for all customers. Your workspace is private so you can work in an environment without distractions or interruptions, and you need to feel comfortable in it; anyone coming in without invitation and taking things without permissions crushes that comfort level. In the future, she needs to respect your private areas – work or otherwise – and your items – work or personal – by not coming to/into them without clear invitation and not taking anything without clear permission. Something set to L$0 is not permission. If she breaches this or makes you uncomfortable in any other way, you will remove her from your friends list and ban her from the area. If she continues to harass you, you will mute her and report her to LL for harassment.

I believe also having up signs or other information stating that you need your privacy and what is and what is not acceptable from visitors, customers or friends may be helpful. I know what I have suggested may come off as harsh, but what this person has done is truly unacceptable socially and warrants a firm, professional response.